LIFE HACK: disguise your nervous breakdown as a series of jokes
Straight boys like “lets threesome” but can’t even please one woman
ATTENTION EVERYONE THIS IS THE REALEST SHIT I’VE EVER READ
Just say “sure babe, let’s get another guy in here” and see how quickly they shut down.
if you’re reading this we’re now in a relationship love you babe
friendly reminder that since Molly took care of Harry for seven years, Lily pays her back by taking care of Fred
friendly reminder that fuck you
I’m grown but I’m not grown grown
Which means I know how to ride a dick but I’m still not sure how taxes work.
threw a boomerang like 6 years ago and it never came back so now I live in constant fear